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Dating Relationship and Romance
by Jason Hulott1

If you have been dating for a long time then sooner or later you will cross from just dating to something more serious and it will turn into a full fledged relationship, but how do you know when this happens? Are there are special signs that tell you, you have crossed that threshold?

While not everyone will know or be able to follow up on the signs, there are signs that could indicate that what you have is turning from more than just dating to a relationship. One of the biggest signs that you are heading into something more serious than just casual dating is if the other asks you to meet their parents. Being asked to meet the parents is a sure fire sign that the other wants to take what you have to a deeper level and develop the relationship into something stronger.

If the other declares that they wish to give up dating others and wants you to do the same and just date each other exclusively, then this is another good indication that the other is setting their sights on something a lot more meaningful than just casual dating. A good indication and warning signs that this could happen is the casual asking of the other if you are seeing others.

Another sign that things are changing and this is one that many fail to give any thought too is the change to your dating schedule. For example if previously you were going out a lot to romantic dinners, going out on elaborate dates and generally being a lot more romantic than the dates you are going on now, then this could be an indication that the two of you are moving into what has been called “The comfort zone”. The comfort zone means that the two of you are settling down in front of the TV to watch a movie in comfortable clothing while sharing take away, while there is nothing wrong with doing this if its what you both enjoy, if it is a big change from the type of dates you shared in the beginning it could be a clear indication that the relationship is developing into something more comfortable and deeper.

One clear indication that you are moving into the relationship stage instead of just dating is if you have a argument and you don’t think that this is the end of the relationship, but instead know at the back of your mind that you will work things out.

While these are just of the biggest indications that what you have is turning into something deeper and stronger there is nothing that can tell you better than following what’s in your heart. The most important thing is that you are happy with the way things are going and if you are not ready to move into the relationship stage then be sure to make this clear before things go too far.

About the Author: Jason Hulott is Director at UK Dating Online, a UK online dating service with reviews of the major dating services as well as lots of useful articles, resources and tips to help you make the most of your dating experience.

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-- April Direct Answers
     from Wayne and Tamara

Direct Answers appears in newspapers on six continents.

-- Direct Answers by Wayne and Tamara

From Sandra:

"Here's an interesting topic Direct Answers hasn't covered: men who tell women, You're crazy."

Wayne & Tamara's Answer:

"Sandra, answering one-sentence questions is like spotting a bit of twine on the ground, following it around the corner and discovering it?s part of a shoulder-high ball of string. Simple questions are the hardest to answer simply, because they lead everywhere.

It is less true now, but in the past women were often treated by men almost as a different species. Unfathomable, irrational, hormonal.

Why do men call women crazy? The first answer is, to get their own way. It's not much different than a parent saying "because I said so" or your boss quoting the employee handbook.

Some men do it out of habit because their dad did it. It's a lazy way of countering a woman's point of view when she's making way too much sense and the man can't figure out how to deal with her. If it works on the woman, it will become a habit.

Below the male bravado is the age-old truth Gavin de Becker spoke. "Women are afraid men will kill them, and men are afraid women will laugh at them." Men band together and call women crazy as a defense against the latent power of women.

Little boys are children in a way little girls never are. Little boys can grow up in a world of astronauts, football players and cowboys?a world divorced from their adult roles. Little girls grow up in the real world, playing with dolls, playing mom and playing house.

Little boys are free agents, not quite sure which way is up, not quite sure how to inhabit this world. That's why many feel boys are more fragile.

"Why can't a woman be more like a man?" is the song question in My Fair Lady. The answer is because women are not men. But the question reflects a male quandary. Women want to communicate and talk feelings, while men want to do and fix.

At a large marriage conference a few years ago, an expert on teaching men and women how to get along was outlining his program of communication skills. A counselor rose in the audience to challenge him. "Doesn't your program feminize men?" he asked.

The expert grew defensive, even visibly angry. It was obvious the questioner struck a nerve.

So some of "women are crazy" is not gaslighting or trying to control a woman by belittling her. Guys don't talk the way women do. It makes them uncomfortable. Raising certain ideas, thoughts and feelings to a conscious level makes men feel weird.

In a world which depended on physical strength, women were property. In a world run on brains, the odds are even and a woman can slice a man with her tongue. But male power once gained is hard to relinquish.

Why do you, as a woman, notice men who say this? Because it's not what you want to hear. But if a man told you what you wanted to hear, you'd be less likely to notice his self-serving intent. To get what he wants a scheming man may say "I love you" or "What if one day we got married."

A man who loves a woman doesn't call her crazy. With other men, it's like trying to change them from being right- or left-handed.

We understand your point about using words to control women, yet it's hard for us as individuals to mount a crusade. To make a dent in society takes a vast effort. That's why we must act on our own behalf.

When you find someone who believes the only way to make money is by gambling, they just fell out of your world. You don't need to throw them under the bus because the two of you aren't standing on the same street corner.

So it is with a man who calls you crazy."

Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at

Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801
or email:

Read an interview with Wayne and Tamara at: